Hello world. The following was written 10/23/2015. The Choice Is Mine The fiery pain of this murderous rage. Has me feeling as if I am going insane. Those who refuse to allow me, to be me. Constantly dictating what they, think I should be. Trying to drag me down into your misery. No thank you, that isn’t for me. The more you push, the more I move away. I am not into, these games that you play. Thinking you are the Guru and know what’s best for me. Sorry, but I, am the Guru of me. I will think, speak, and believe as I do. No one will rule my world, especially not you. As I shut the door in your face. Your calculated looks of love turn to hate. Unless I am doing whatever you ask. A judgmental knife you’ll twist in my back. If this is what love means to you. You are more twisted than even I knew. How does one learn to love unconditionally? When all the examples you get are egoistic and illusory. Dictated to you with the back of a hand. You learn to do on demand. I lived that life once easily. Now Continue Reading
The seeds buried within them cause their pain and suffering.
Hello world. The following was written 10/22/2017. I am in a very strange place this morning. I am having snippets of my dreams flash through my mind this morning as I am scrolling through Facebook. The more I read of these posts people are making the more I want to literally walk away from every single one of these people and their inability to be responsible for themselves. Each of them have their heads buried so far up the persons ass who is supposedly teaching them, it is no wonder they have no clue who they are. They are blindly following and believing everything being said to them by their supposed guru and everything they read in books like good little robots. In my dreams I can remember being on the Astral Plane with the silver umbilical cords attached to the Beings around me. In each one I could see the seeds buried within them that has cause all their pain and suffering. I can see each belief and it’s rottenness festering within them. In the dream I would follow the cord to that seed. I could reach into them and pull out the seeds of doubt and fear and Continue Reading
Looking through the looking glass at Heaven if we only choose to see it.
Hello world. The following was written 10/22/2015. Through the looking glass a reflection stares back at me that I have never truly seen. A visage of flushed cheeks rosy from rosacea. Glassy eyes still clouded with the morning events. The internal struggle of feeling helpless in the wake of those closest to you battling their own personal demons. The mental and emotional demons telling us this is life or death, make your choice now. My mother is a 20 year cancer survivor. Yet she is still battling this disease and it’s side effects daily. Her liver and kidneys are failing now because of the Chemotherapy she went through. Now they tell her she must undergo another surgery or she will not be here in 5 years. For the past 3 months I have been helping her as best I can. The irony here is that I may have only five years left to get to better know who my mother is as a person. To see her without the blinders of childhood memories or society’s dictates. In this, I have been learning she is no different than I am. She thinks, she feels, she experiences everything the same as me. Continue Reading